If you love yourself you'll forgive them

     Holding a grudge or hating someone is a burden and a waste of energy. My mom always says that holding a grudge against someone is like drinking poison and expecting the person you hate to die. It’s ironic that she says that actually because my mom is the queen of holding grudges. I think witnessing the pain my mom puts herself through by not forgiving is why feel I must always forgive people. Everyday she puts so energy into making this person feel bad and known that she has a problem with them. I believe that all the energy she uses to try to intimidate this person is what leads to her stress related medical issues. All these vibes and you choose the negative ones? Thats why I believe that forgiveness is the smartest quality to have if you love yourself. 

     Forgiveness does not mean excusing or forgetting what happened. To forgive, you except that they've made a mistake and that you still love them as a friend, colleague, family member, or whatever the case may be. To forget what they have done to you is foolish and destructive. We need to learn from peoples mistakes the same way people need to learn from their mistakes. If someone steals money from and you forgive them that doesn't mean you can now trust them again. If that person were to come over your house it would be idiotic for you to leave money on the table just because you’ve forgiven them. It also shows to that person that they can get away with their misdeed because nothing has changed. When someone does an injustice toward you it is opportunity for you to be enlightened because this person has shown what they are capable of doing. You must be able to forgive this person so that you are not burdened with hatred but at the same be meticulous so that it doesn't happen again.